The concept of love language is one that, when discovered, would make your relationship a whole lot easier. This is because it eases the tension of miscommunication by encouraging mutual understanding. When understanding thrives between a couple, there would be less cause for worry. Otherwise, there would be constant relationship feuds for reasons unknown.
Petty reasons could also be the cause of a breakup — as petty as forgetting to put the cap back on the toothpaste. This is why the best way to know your partner is to first know their love language.
You can jump right into a relationship banking on the pre-relationship knowledge. All the casual dates and the playful kisses would not last the tide. Eventually, the veil you wear to ensure you get that man or woman would soon come off. Sooner than you think, you would be expected to put in the work to make that partnership work.
Certainly, you need all the building blocks in your relationship first. There much be love, trust, affection and the desire to communicate. These building blocks are vital before you begin to solidify that relationship.
After you discover the love language of your partner through careful analysis, then you can divert all your affection towards meeting their needs. Rather than waste all your money on buying flowers and candy, probably all they need from you is a simple ‘I love you’. Love languages vary and, when not done ideally, you can misinterpret your partner’s.
Therefore, find out the different types of love languages as postulated by Gary Chapman in his book – The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. When you identify, understand and speak your partner’s love language, your relationship is guaranteed to last.
What your love language reveals about you
Here are five most talked about love languages. Identify yours or that of your partner, and discover what it reveals about you.
1. Words of affirmation
If you fall into this category, then you simply live for those endearing words from your partner. You need reassurance that you’re loved. Also, you like to get complimented especially when you wear something new. Then you want to be encouraged and supported all the way by your partner. If your partner doesn’t say it, how would you know it?
2. Acts of service
This is more about the ‘doers’. You need to see them put in the effort by showing you how much they love you. Sure, you can say it, but prove it. Demonstrate your affection in little gestures like opening the door, or big gestures like planning a surprise party.
3. Receiving gifts
For you, gifts mean a lot, and you put a lot of significance to it. If every gift you’ve ever received is symbolic to you in a certain way, then this is your love language.
4. Quality time
Some relationships break up because one partner got too engrossed with their phone. In some cases where a partner is fine with words of affirmation mainly, then it might not be an issue. Otherwise, if yours is to spend quality time with your partner, it would be a big issue. You want to be with that person often and do things together, even if it’s just the dishes.
5. Physical touch
You may believe everyone enjoys this, but some enjoy this more than most. And no, it’s not all about s*x, but also about little things like holding hands and kissing. Between a couple, there’s that one who loves to snuggle or hold hands often. If you don’t understand this about your partner and pull away, you may make them feel like you don’t actually love them. It’s not that complicated actually.
People speak more than one love language. For instance, you might enjoy gifts the most, but that does not imply you’re immune to not receiving words of affirmation. The fact is, one usually takes more prominence than the other. Nevertheless, a good tender loving care with all love languages involved wouldn’t hurt.