Ever felt this irresistibly drawn to a person, even with all the alarm bells sounding in your head so much you feel you can’t live without them? Karmic relationships are usually this way.

“A karmic relationship is one that’s filled with all-consuming passion but is extremely difficult to maintain,” explains Sanam Hafeez, PsyD, a neuropsychologist and faculty member at Columbia University.

Karmic relationships are usually filled with pleasure, passion, and an equal dosage of pain. They’re not meant to last long as they should serve as a learning curve for the person or persons involved.

“They’re opportunities to learn something about yourself that you never knew before, as well as the most significant life lessons in love,” she says.

Shannon Kaiser, author of The Self-Love Experiment agrees; “They’re meant to help you grow at soul level in often difficult push-pull ways,” “But usually they are not intended to last a long time. This is because you are coming together in this life to clear karma between each other. It’s often a balancing out of a bad experience from a past life.”

To have a fuller idea of how to identify Karmic relationships and how to break from them, read more below.

Signs of a Karmic relationship;

The connection is explosive

Karmic relationships usually begin on a high note and you’d be right in the middle of it before you realise what’s happening.

“It grips both partners tightly, and despite the damage done to both, they don’t seem to be able to let go of each other, even though everybody around them is telling them to end it,” says Andrew Aaron, LICSW, a marriage counselor and s*x and relationship therapist.

There’s usually an instant connection in a karmic relationship” Hafeez agrees. “And for some inexplicable reason, you feel magnetically drawn to the other person and like you can’t live without them,” she says.

It is filled with hiccups and drama

These relationships are usually filled with storms and tempests. “If drama is the foundation for your love affair, chances are you’re in a karmic relationship,” says Kaiser.

“All relationships have their ups and downs, but in a karmic relationship, rough patches feel like a pervasive weight on your chest,” Hafeez adds.

There’s a lot of miscommunication

“Usually, there is a lot of push and pull and miscommunication,” Kaiser notes. This may result in words hurling which will eventually begin to breed resentment in the persons involved.

They’re co-dependent.

They usually have the markings of a co-dependent relationship. This makes them addictive says Hafeez and you’ll find it difficult to end things. Even with all the issues that rack the relationship and the alarm bells going off in your head, you can’t just seem to end things.

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They bring out the worst in you

Because of its intensely tumultuous nature, karmic relationships will always bring out your worst sides. You’ll find yourself doing or saying things that you are not proud of.

Fearful of how it will end

Hafeez says someone in a Karmic relationship always feels the end looming and fears for how they’ll cope when the end comes. Sometimes the fear of being alone makes people remain even when the relationship is obviously toxic.

How to end it

Walking away from a relationship is never easy, especially one that is abusive, codependent, and toxic.

“Significant strength is required to break away from the kind of intense connection that exists in the victim/victimizer and codependent dynamic,” says Aaron.

He continues that such a cycle exists because the person involved has a twisted idea of their self-worth and value. To break away completely, a support system is important.

“The best way to move on from these kinds of situations is to recognize the lesson from it,” says Hafeez.

Also, she says to prioritize your self-worth and your self-respect.

“If your relationship doesn’t seem to prosper without you at your best self, you should act on it,” she explains.

Because of their nature, karmic relationships will most likely end in a flurry and dramatic note. However, do not seek closure but firmly move on from it.

“When you cut the cord and learn your lesson, you break free from the karmic bond forever,” she explains.

There’s a plus from all of it, you’d have learned a lot about yourself and what you want from your next relationship when it ends.

 

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