While some people wear their hearts on their sleeves, it can be pretty hard to give an accurate reading of anyone instantly. A lot of people have brilliantly perfected the art of camouflaging their feelings. They smile and laugh when they are sad. Others could feign anger when they are genuinely scared.
So, reading anyone instantly and getting to know their true emotions may not be as easy as it seems. However, psychologists have shared tips on how you can read people you meet for the first time. No matter how hard people try to hide how they feel, they would always let one or two of these cues out.
Once you know how to read people, you would know how to deal with them. From their eye contact to their body language, there are more hints you usually would ignore that could help you know someone more. Getting to know people better would make them more approachable through a better understanding of why they act the way they do.
However, because people are wired differently, some of these tips may not prove accurate. But these are indeed general signs to reading anyone instantly. Become wiser by knowing the following tips.
Ten psychological tips to reading anyone instantly
According to experts, 55% of what we convey come from body language. Meanwhile, 38% comes from the tone of voice and only 7% comes from what we say. Therefore, beyond the appearance and what they say, you have to look at their body language and the tone of their voice.
1. Eye contact
When it comes to eye contact, you need to consider the context. Your eyes say a lot about how you truly feel, and they weren’t termed “the window to your soul” for no reason. When a person looks at you intensely and for a prolonged period, it could mean they have a sort of romantic interest in you. However, if you do see anyone flaring their nostrils or lifting a harmful object, then don’t think twice about fleeing. They might be violent. If their stare is unblinking and too intense, and it makes you squirm, then they may be lying to you or just being a creep.
Also, when someone has shifty eyes (they can’t seem to maintain eye contact), then they may have something to hide. Although they could also be nervous.
Eyebrows are very expressive. When a person raises their eyebrow when not required, then they may be feeling uncomfortable.
A lot of people know how to fake a smile, but only a few know how to fake it with their eyes. This is why you can’t truly lie with a smile. A genuine smile reaches the eyes causing some natural crinkles at the corners of the eyes. If they aren’t there, then you would know they aren’t being genuine.
This is a kind of nonverbal communication that can give a lot away just by what you say. It can be reflected in your tone, pitch or manner of speaking. When someone answers you in a monotone then you should know they are not interested in that conversation. A common giveaway for paralanguage is the use of sarcasm.
5. Side glance
If someone genuinely wants to meet you, they would give you their full attention. On the contrary, they would give a side glance if they are not completely engaged in that conversation. They are probably looking for an escape.
6. Excessive nodding
Yes, nodding is usually a positive assertion. However, when done repeatedly, then it just may be a sign of nervousness. They want to please you or are hoping to finish what you’re saying quickly so that they can move on.
This a big giveaway of confidence. It is indicated when you throw your shoulders back and look straight ahead. Although, some people slouch naturally. So while they may be seen as nervous, they just may be that way naturally. Either way, having your chin up (slouch or not) shows that you’ve got confidence. On the contrary, looking down passes across a message of low self-esteem.
8. Rubbing hands
When a person rubs their hands together, it means they have a positive feeling about something. They do this when they are excited about something or hopeful about something they look forward to in the future.
A soft handshake makes you seem like a pushover. Meanwhile, a hard handshake makes you seem like a domineering person. The nest handshake is one that is firm but not too hard. One that’s too long is weird, but a short handshake makes it seem like you can’t wait to get away.
10. Crossed arms and legs
During a conversation, when a person crosses their arms and legs, it means they are not open to what you’re saying. They seem defensive. Psychologically, it means a person is emotionally, mentally and physically blocked off from what you’re saying.